lame

My birthday is just causing problems for everybody.

concerned

Last night my 8 year old cousin informed me that some kid in his class that was mean to him had " a blabbermouth the size of Canada....no, Asia, no the UNIVERSE" and that he wants to "put him in a meat grinder and throw the remains in an incinerator." Also he wants to "cut his butt off and glue it his face" I told him I was sure he didn't mean that and he assured me he did. Cough. Kids say the darndest things...?

faith

I may be regaining my faith in the bus system. I only waited like three minutes this morning. This is vastly different from the time the bus driver looked me in the eye and passed right by me. My dad might have made a phone call. And threatened to make it into a news story. I love my father.

please?

Will someone please appease me by playing either Candy land or Apples to Apples with me? Please. I will give you....a high five. That is all I can afford to give you. I also give awesome hugs and have a shelf full of snacks.

because I can't say it to you

Because it's awkward and I feel like it's not my place. I'm so sorry. It's not your fault, and it will be okay. Breathe, and take time to heal. Sometimes terrible things happen without reason and I wish I had an explanation ;I know you are wishing for the exact same thing. It's all part of a bigger plan(or at least that's what I'm hoping). I wish I could be there for you in a better way.

puppylove

NILLABADILLA! My bestest frann.

so close

sara is makin fun of me

for dancing in the studio to this song.

props to drew d. for introducing this to me, and to micah for putting it on my itunes <3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLfwEp7vij4

Quitting Retail and Getting a Nose Ring

First of all, I'm not sure why I capitalized the title of this post, considering the fact that I never do that. Anyway, I am finally done with Godiva, and though I will miss endless amounts of chocolate, here are the things I will not miss:

-screaming children
-parents who allow their children to scream
-parents who tell their kids the gems are samples
-parents who act like kids
-frat guys assuring me they aren't gay
-people who wont get off their cell phone
-people who dont use words, only gestures
-people who assume I'm their personal slave
-people calling truffles "balls"
-people who scream at me about the prices(that I don't make)
-being underpaid and under-appreciated
-being a target because I didn't drop out of school for retail
-people who grab strawberries with their bare hands and then decide not to buy them
-old people who think im stealing their identity when i ask to sign them up for the rewards club
-freezing my ass off
-washing dishes
-being harassed for samples(by people who never buy anything)
-people who look at me like im retarded when i say hello, can I help you with anything?
-people in general
-corporate bullshit
-hating christmas by the time christmas comes
-people literally fighting over who gets the last Godiva bear at Christmas
-staying late at the mall for holiday hours
-getting yelled at because your grandkids wont get their chocolate santa, because you waited until Christmas Eve and we're out
-getting asked if we sell coffee
-getting asked what a "dehcaydense"(decadence) is
-hearing it pronounced Go-dee-vuh
-hearing people say" Five dollars for a strawburry! I can go ta Walmart and get some burries 'n Hersheys for halfa that!"
-the girl who thinks we are Starbucks and orders "A Dark Chocolate Decadence with light caramel, light ice, no whip, and chocolate instead of caramel syrup in the cup"

So, in honor of potentially losing five pounds due to no more Godiva, I got a new nose ring. It is a hoop, which I've always wanted but couldnt have because Godiva wouldn't let me. My hole grew crooked and really small because I was retarded and messed with it too soon while it was healing when I first got it. So, because of this, the girl had to essentially guage my hole two sizes bigger.Which hurt. A lot. Way more then when I got it pierced. BUT Saint Tattoo is awesome and very helpful and I'd do it all again. Check out how cute it is! :]

stress

Its one of those days that no matter what I do or what happens, I feel unoriginal, lost and without promise. I feel totally isolated and I think I may only feel better when something bad enough happens to trigger a good let-it-all-out cry.

Janis Ian

Another great discovery from my mom's record collection. This used to be one her favorite songs , and I think I might be in love with it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMxJ1jjbUUM

you owe it to yourself to give it a listen(cough cough Leah, Lisa, and Sara)

awesome

The same weekend as my birthday party is some other epic party in the fort. There goes my guest list. Am I in a time warp? Because with things as shitty as they've been, I might be back in highschool, in my scrawny,poorly dressed freshman body, schlepping down the hallway while recieving dissapproving stares from the entire student body.

bathroom dilemma

Word to the wise: Always check your bathroom stall surroundings before speaking aloud in the ladies room.

Today,as Sara and I were entering the A&A restroom, we were talking about the possibility of a keg at my 21st birthday party. Her boyfriend had offered to buy it as a gift, and I was telling her to make sure to let me know if he decides to do so, so I don't buy it myself unknowingly. At this point I enter my stall and continue talking to Sara two stalls over.

"I mean if he wants it to be a surprise, just have him tell Micah"

Sara:" Or I mean....he could just tell me"

Me:"Well I guess that's true. I'd say you and me are on the same level of closeness as me and Micah anyway. Except I pee with the door open in front of Micah, and I'm not sure I'm ready to take our relationship to that level."

Sara sheepishly laughs from the end stall....

We emerge from our respective cubicles, and who is standing between us washing her hands at the sink?

Thats right, my design 351 professor. Who now knows I am having a kegger, and that I pee in front of my boyfriend. I stared hard at the sink to avoid eye contact.Poor Sara knew she was in there the whole time, but obviously couldn't say anything to stop me from word vomiting everywhere.

Things could be a little awkward from here on out....Good thing being in the art building pretty much guarantees she isn't conservative(this is what I'm hoping for anyway).

Happy Monday

come back to me

summer 2007

my beautiful grandmother, Celia

the loveliest lady in the world. You would be lucky to know her.

TVF/Charlie Daniels

I haven't been to the fair for two years and therefore was super stoked at the prospect of going this year. My excuse for not going these past couple of times has been lack of time, and lack of anyone that wanted to go with me. This year Micah agreed to go with me, so naturally I had this very ideal image of me walking around with a me-size teddy bear Micah won for me and putting away some cotton candy while contemplating riding the Himalya for the 10th time. I was oh so very wrong....

Micah and I couldn't find anyone to go with us. Everyone was doing something called "homework" so it turned into a "date." Only, not so much, because the tickets were free and we only paid for parking, and a few dollars for saratoga chips(YUM) and a caramel apple. Micah didn't want to rde the rides because the tickets were too expensive, and I didn't want to ride alone. Lauren and I used to be fair addicts. Our parents would drop us off with 4o bucks and we'd buy an unlimited ride wristband and as much cheap jewelry and fried food as we could with the remainder. So...In light of my past fair experiences, I was initially disappointed.


HOWEVER.

We did meet Charlie Daniels.


And watched his entire show from backstage, just feet away from Philip Fulmer.Have I ever mentioned my dad has the most awesome radio job in the whole world? And is the shit in general? I will never have anything bad to say about him or his occupation as radio-expert-of-the-world.

I also forgot to mentioned that I petted a little chick and duckie at the petting zoo. And have decided I will one day own an alpaca.


Lastly, I raided all my moms records last night and must now recommend one of my mothers favorite songs from the 70s(if you know my mom, prepare to crack up)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONXQbbJJLuM&feature=related

Inspiration

Rick Ross+Jay Z+John Legend=the hottest of hot shit


He without sin shall cast the first stone
So y’all look in the mirror
Double check your appearance
Bitch I said I was amazing
Not that I'm a Mason
It's amazing that I made it though the maze that I was in
Lord forgive me I never would’ve made it without sin

-Jay-Z

please don't make fun of me, but due to lack of sleep and my extreme love for this song...I tear up every time I hear it haha.

asshole.

Today,I turned in a written critique to the author(a classmate) of the short story we workshopped in my fiction writing class today. I didn't like the story at all and I thought the characters were contrived and the dialogue forced. I said this in a more constructive, direct way in the paper I gave her. Turns out, the whole class LOVED it. RAVED about it even.The teacher said she wanted to "steal lines from it." I was the only one who had negative feelings toward it. Did I mention my name was at the top of my critique? I am waiting for the death threats to start pouring in.

socially awkward

Examples of how I have been robbed of any social grace by graphic design.


No one understand when I say things like:

"Whoa, look that the weight of that stroke in the L, how beautiful!"

"The disconnect of the juncture in that P makes the letterform really open"

"You overused Helvetica"

"The stroke around that letterform really detracts from it's elegance"

"The negative space isn't activated in this composition"

"But what is this SAYING"

So no one should be surprised that today when I ran into an old high school classmate at Panera, I had literally nothing to say. She started asking me about my job(where I was headed after grabbing my bagel). There were painful silences where I should've been making small talk, so I asked,"So, how was rush?" She said, "...I'm not in a sorority." I naturally assume that anyone more popular that me at my private high school is in a sorority now.

She adds, "I am a Young Life leader"

My famous response: "Oh....that's...productive"

They shouldn't let me outside of the A&A building.ever. I have all the bagels and socially awkward arty friends I could ever need right there.

um.um.yes.shoes.yes.

found at the wonderful modcloth.com

yeahyeahyeah

How I wish you could see the potential,
the potential of you and me.
It's like a book elegantly bound but,
in a language that you can't read.
Just yet.

You gotta spend some time, Love.
You gotta spend some time with me.
And I know that you'll find, love
I will possess your heart.


-death cab for cutie

bumbumbumbum

I want to become talented at playing bongos/african drums.

Also, I turned in my two weeks to Godiva on wednesday! FU retail!

Story #2 for Fiction Writing class

This was so opposite from the other nights we shared together. Typically we sat on my wide-paneled hardwood, sipping cheap white wine until our ankle bones hurt from our cross-legged stance. Occasionally we’d break out Yahtzee, but usually the dice fell no further than my fingertips . I tumbled them around in my moist palms and listened to the sound of ivory on ivory when the conversation became slow.

I remember the first night she told me, there in my room. There was really no reason for it but to hear the way the syllables came together. There was no reason for this kind of absolution. I couldn’t stand to see her look at me that way, pleading. She already knew I loved her. She already knew. Hearing her say it seemed profane somehow.

The water was so warm on this night. We wiggled our toes in the murky green liquid and spoke in flat tones that carried across the lake. I always hated the way the bottom floor felt and for that reason had avoided swimming here, but tonight was an exception. This was her place. She brought me here and I knew that this was going to be our secret. This was something sacred.

After she couldn’t stand it any longer I watched her slip into the water. I imagined the squishy floor between her bony toes as she treaded further away from me. She didn’t turn around and I didn’t call out to her. I noticed the way her white linen dress billowed around her. I watched as the water embraced her small frame. I noticed the way the ripples enlarged to infinity and then to nothingness. I watched until all I saw was a sheet of glass. I sat there for minutes, hours, forever. I listened to the stillness and thought of how I loved her.

awesome

Email to my Fiction writing teacher:

Dr.Hoffer,
I won't be in class today. I'm having a crazy allergy flare-up and they just fit me in at the doctor's. I will get notes/an overview from a classmate. I noticed we have a prompt due for tuesday over death and dying. Are there any particular parameters I should be mindful of?

Thanks so much,
Paige Berry

her response:

Hi Paige,

The death and dying scene should be a one page scene in which someone dies, and it's due today, but you can bring it for Tuesday.

Dr.Hoffer


Awesome. I work every day this week and have no time for the 10 or more hours of homework I have for the weekend. Even more behind, even less sleep.No social life. Still feeling like design has completely escaped me. I'm going to drop out and work at In-N-Out. At least then I'll be out west.

Wilco kind of day

I am looking forward
Toward the shadows tracing bones
Our faces stitched and sewing
Our houses hemmed into homes
Trying to be thankful
Our stories fit into phones
And our voices lift so easily
A gift given accidentally
When we’re not sure
We’re not alone

-You Are My Face

P.S.

Everything in my closet had babies, and therefore my closet is now population:EXPLOSION

speed

I am about to go meet leah at starbucks and therefore am writing this in like 2 minutes. This really isn't necessary, except I feel I'm being disloyal to my blog by neglecting it these past couple of days. First of all, I'm having a really hard time prying my ass from my ever so comfy bed, while lounging in my favorite leopard print fleece PJs and UCLA hoodie. I will be going from slob to decent in like 2 minutes. Today as been a good day due to a lunch outing with Micah and the parentals at cracker barrel. I probably gained 20 lbs, but whatever, the maternity section at target is actually pretty cute. The guy across the street was blasting classical music and painting a few minutes ago. I'm sad he stopped. I tried to open my window to hear it better and the breeze felt SO good(hellyes to the coming fall months), but my window apparently doesn't hold itself open and I managed to break my blinds(again) and I think I got some splinters in my finger. I'm way less worried than I should be about all the design stuff I have to do, due to the fact that I just want to drink some gin and watch boomsday fireworks while enjoying this marvelous weather. Happy labor day :]

good shit

These guys are awesome. I'm not at all biased because my boyfriend is the drummer. cough. But they are awesome and you should check out their new shit.


BAM